Have you ever wondered how scientists know if rivers are healthy?

 In class, we have been learning about the water cycle and its functions. Here is a reading response I did during class this week

Narrative Writitng

 I have been learning to use show not tell to make a narrative interesting. I have been learning how to use show not tell to make my narrative exciting. I have tried to have a character dialogue, and describe what characters think and feel. This is a story I changed.

                                                          The Rip        
There were two brothers who were not at all alike;  they were different in every way. The younger brother stayed on the sand. Jack the older brother, was always in the water. Jack liked to swim with his bros, diving and tumbling, bombing and snorkeling, and surfing in the waves. During the day Jack wanted to go on lots of adventures but James the younger brother would stay safe on the sand. Sometimes Jack would creep up to James and drag him into the water. “Oh come on you little chicken, it’s only waves,” Jack said. 

One morning their mother got angry with them, “like cats and mice! Out you go, both of you”, mum said angrily. “and just be nice and try to bond with each other for once”. “Why are you coming? ”Jack moaned. James sighed, “I didn’t even want to come in the first place. “You're such a baby! You're afraid of everything” Jack walked, leaving James behind. When the two brothers arrived at the beach Jack dived straight into the water but James stayed on the sand building a sandcastle. “Come on, get in!” Jack yelled. ‘‘Why would I go into the water when there are massive waves that can smash you like a hammer!”, James yelled back.

‘‘Hey James! Come here’’, Jack yelled. James refused and shook his head, but he was curious. James walked over to see why Jack wanted him. ‘‘What is it?’’, James questioned. ‘‘look do you see that over there?’’ Jack asked ‘‘There is a rip right there and I'm going to go in it’’. ‘‘NO! You can't it's too dangerous!’’ Jack ignored James as he dived straight into the dark, creepy rip. Jack got sucked out into the ocean waves like mountains crashed down on him.

James swam as fast as he could trying to reach his brother, but Jack kept on getting stuck under the waves. Fear gripped his heart. Tears threatened to burst from his eyes. What could he do? He had to go further deep into the ocean. The sea was cold, deep, and creepy. As it got deeper James found himself in a dark part of the ocean - there was no sign of his brother. Shivering, he saw the sea morph into a dark hole. Sharks, stingrays, jellyfish - what kind of creatures are lurking at him? His mind told him to turn back, but his heart wouldn’t let him. He could not leave - for what would become of his brother. “Jack! Where are you?” he yelled as he swam. The more he swam, the more he wanted to find his brother. In a nick of time, a surfer zoomed in on his board and snatched James out of the water. “Woah little dude what are you doing out here?” the surfer said. “My brother is in the rip” James cried, “Don’t worry kid ill get him”. The surfer pulled Jack onto his surfboard and took Jack and James onto the sand where they were safe. “Thank you for saving us,” Jack said, “No worries,” The surfer said, “and call me Kai. In Hawaiian culture, it means "sea."

The soft wind came through and brushed all the sand off their feet it was a nice soothing breeze and Jack and James were happy to see each other. They wrapped their arms around each other and decided to go home now after that long crazy day. They ran back through the sand together. when they had arrived home and their mother was doing the dishes. ‘‘Hello guys,’’ mother said, ‘‘you two seem oddly silent. ‘‘Is everything ok what happened?’’ James quietly giggled. Jack was trying to hold in his laugh. ‘‘Oh, nothing happened,’’ James smirked.

 

Are you healthy?

 In class, we are learning what it means to be healthy. I learned that just because you're not sick does not mean you are healthy.

Cold Task

In class, we do a 'Cold Task' to find out what we already know. Our cold task was on a narrative. This is what I  have in 30 minutes.

We are to self-access our writing so we know what we are good at and what we need to improve on.

The two things I want to improve is putting figurative language and show not tell in my writing.

COLD  TASK TERM 2 2022 NARRATIVE 

Write a narrative, this could be a story you make up or a whanau story you retell. 
Name: Pana 

One afternoon, my cousins and I finished swimming at the beach because we had a batch near it. After our swim, we decided to go down to the swings. After these other people came down and started playing on the other swing. 

This boy came down on a scooter doing all sorts of things and showing off. My cousins and I were just swinging on the swing and looking at them. And the boy with the scooter, he was holding it on the back wheel, like he was trying to do a wheelie. 

The boy kept revving the scooter. Suddenly, he let the scooter go. VVVRRRMMM! The scooter slipped out of his hand, it flipped and landed with its tires facing up.

‘’It's going to turn off!’’ everyone shouted. ‘’It's fine it's not gonna turn off’’ the boy said. Just then the scooter putted out. Later the boy picked up the scooter and he had to walk it back to his house.